Sometimes (as in every two weeks), Monday is Cover Snark Day! These covers are mostly safe for work, save for some very waxed chests. Let’s get to it!
From Reader Jennifer: Got this in my BookBub email today. This cover!!! Hair! Half a body (an homage to the bog bodies in the National Museum of Ireland?)! phallic symbols (I think perhaps a trip to the Dr. is in order – i don’t that fluff is normal)! My day sucked until I saw this.
Sarah: I am telling you, my nose was 3mm away from the computer screen before I figured out that thing WASN’T a toilet plunger.
Redheadedgirl: I swear they took Jessica Chastain from the Huntsman movie and changed the face a little.
Sarah: Whoever she is, she’s mighty annoyed about having to clean that toilet.
And he’s all, “Well, my job here is done! Might as well fade away. It’s not like she’ll forget my visit, know what I mean??”
Amanda: How subtle that his man titty is framed ever so delicately between the bow and its string.
Redheadedgirl: I don’t think that beard is real.
Sarah: I don’t think the other guy thinks so, either.
Carrie: Santa does not look Jolly.
Amanda: His beard looks like what I pull out of my dryer’s lint trap. REMINDER: Clean out those lint traps people!
Amanda: There’s a lot going on here.
Like maybe do that thing where before you go out, you look in the mirror and take on thing off.
Redheadedgirl: Like your pec implants.
Or the weirdly long rise in the jeans.
OR MAYBE PUT A DIAPER ON THAT BABBY YOU WILL BE BAPTIZED.
Amanda: Also…are they in the old west?
Sarah: That cover is definitely unforgettable. As is the subtext that he’s going to breastfeed that baby.
Elyse: He’s got the boobs for it.
Carrie: The framing of the baby in his arms is lovely until you realize, as you will if you’ve ever held a baby, that in five seconds that baby is gonna flip right over and leave the dude looking awfully silly.
Sarah: When I talk about how readers want books featuring women together, this isn’t want I meant.
Carrie: If you take the black ribbon off her head falls off so don’t do that.
Amanda: They’re going to destroy that man in the back. But also, what if they are like cougar shifters and it turns out it’s a horror novel.
Sarah: And he’s dinner?
Amanda: Yes.
Elyse: The font is like a bad Lisa Frank dream
Sarah: …there are bad Lisa Frank dreams??